At 1045, skippy, Chelsea, mattie, and Kevan went to meet Nick Hayes at the Garnish House where he was staying. He gave us a really cool and long talk about his book, and irish American relations. I use my last name to seque into him talking about Russia, and he said it is actually pronounced Uwhh-zjeh-latch, like in Jzarrrr with the French tickler.
After the lecture, Mattie and Chelsea and i waited while nick tried to get us a cab to go to the airport to pick up the rental car he just rented. I joked about civilized disease pools and the fact that i actually like Plagues and Peoples. After standing around for many minutes, a fat cabbie came and picked us up.
We got to the airport and Nick rented a car. It was nice and shiny. Nick said the first thing he does is check the lights and wipers to find out where they are. We set off from the airport to find N25 and go to Dungarbhan. Nick kept telling us to not tell our parents about this, because he was not an expert driver and may get us into a crash. He hasn’t driven here for a while and was out of practice. So after going through many roundabouts, we made it onto N25. On one roundabout, we went around twice because we didn’t know where to turn. I’ll say that a car is the best way to travel though, for reasons discussed later.
So on the road, we talked about many things. Ancestry, English rule of Ireland, Nick’s writing conferences, Nick’s stories, the stuff we have been doing in Ireland, and a general everything. I threw in lots of historical facts, and i knew a ton of stuff about Ireland that not even the professor knew! I think this is because of my ability to remember worthless facts and the fact that i am learning Irish history from 3 different prospective in 3 different classes. I told nick the stories about the fairie’s revenge, the trips to dingle, Ballycotton, and a whole score of things. Eventually we got stuck in traffic by Ardmore, because there was a gaelic football tournament going on. We eventually found the signs and got on the road to Killrossanty!
Nick had told us about how the blight had started in the Pale, and Waterford and Wexford were especially hard hit. He said he came to Kilrossanty a long time ago, and went to the pub. There was a 15 year old girl serving, and he asked if there were any Hayes people still alive, and she said there were 4 brothers who owned this pub. But he didn’t see them that trip, and then next time he came by they had moved away. We drove by the one pub, and got to the ruins of this church. It had holy wells. Nick had commented on how the hedgerows were pretty to drive by, expect for when the cars come by. We walked through a trail of hedge rows, and got to the old ruins. They were very impressive. We right away found the unmarked grave where Nick’s family is buried, and found another stone that said Helen Hayes. He said another family member of his had decided to do the same thing and find the burial grounds of their ancestors. When we were here, nobody else was it was quiet and sunny, and we could see Mahon Falls in the background. Nick was impressed that i had done that climb with the hiking club.
We went to the holy wells and nick whipped out his huge, black camera to take pictures of this cross that was on the fencepost. He did all these crazy poses just like me! The well was kind of dirty, but it was holy water in it, he said. There were three of them. The scene was idyllic. We went and looked at more headstones. Nick had said the best pictures he has ever taken were of the angels in st. Declan’s in Ardmore. He really likes these ruinous places, and so do I. Mattie had forgotten her camera, so i was in charge of taking pictures of the ruins. This was the coolest ruins ever, because they were completely overgrown with vines.
We walked back from the ruins and Nick suggested going to Mahon falls. He had said earlier that large waterfalls were rare in Ireland, and that people thought it was sacred and St. Bridget had opened up the falls for people. I thought this would be a great idea! We were right on the way. I asked Nick if the brown hills ever turned green, and he said they do in the summer! I could see the hulking Mahon falls hills as we wound up the road towards there. Expect today, the weather was much nicer! We parked in the parking lot. We got out, and it was crowded with tourists. I honestly never thought that there would be so many people at mahon falls. People were walking their dogs and one took a big shit. We walked up to the waterfall, and Nick and i were talking about cameras and picture taking. We had a good picture by the falls, and then went back to the lot. It was beautiful and refreshing to be at the falls again. I told Nick that i never expected to come back to Mahon Falls in my life, and that it was a treat. He said that nothing is a coincidence. We drove back towards cork and talked about Northern Ireland, and mammals, and the new FYS curriculum that he is planning on implementing. Also, we talked about Bill Holm and Nick told us about what Bill Holm said in our class about Obama’s daughters. Perv.
Then we got back and took quite an interesting and intense route through cork city to the hotel. We drove through parts i had never seen before, and got confused on the roads, and hit the mirror against another car. It reminded me of when we were on the country roads, Nick would swear and say Jesus Christ!! Every time a car shot out going the other direction. It was hilarious. He got so jumpy on those narrow roads because of the oncoming traffic’s dangers. We made it back to the hotel at about 630, and then took a break before dinner.
We met at the gates of the college at 715. There wasn’t much conversation to be had at this point. Then Tom MacCarthy comes up and introduces himself. He is this older, kind of ugly guy. We get into his car, and Nick Hayes immediately starts bragging to him about teaching at hamline, and all this other prestigious crap. The guy drove us alot around the north part of town, and showed us some cool stuff. He said the cornerhouse is the best pub ever. He talked about this one parish with a priest named Punit or Parnell or something, and how they had their kids baptized there. We saw a sign for a protestant church that said something about being happy and joyful. Tom said, you have to “leave it to the protestants to bring joy in the existentially morose post-catholic Ireland.” Nick said that he heard a saying that “Catholicism doesn’t bring joy, but it brings hope”.
We got to Tom MacCarthy’s house. It was on this road called Lover’s Lane, except for Tom said that the name is Gaelic and was mispronounced, it’s actually Leper’s lane, because an old leper colony used to be located here. We got out of the car, and his house was beyond this wall with a gate in it. We walked along the sidewalk...and got a breathtaking view of Cork city! His house was on a ridge overlooking cork. They even had a yard and garden! I am sure this place was very expensive. We walked inside and greeted his wife patricia. They had a daughter too named Kate who studied Russian and lived in Russia, and she was pretty fine. Nick Hayes immediately started talking to her in Russian.
We sat in the living room and just talked about general stuff. When the guy offered drinks, i first said i would take a wine. But then he said, how about some jameson? I said “well..i never could turn down a spot of jameson” and he clapped me on the knee and said “we're sure friends then.” We talked for a while and Tom showed Nick some old books that belonged to a priest or something. Their living room had a fireplace with some peat burning in it, nice decorations, a boom box with hundreds of cds, and a huge door thing that looked out over Cork. It was also orange.
We walked into the kitchen, and they serve us this delicious salad! I never thought just plain vegetables could be so good. Dinner was golden wonder potatoes, which were floury heaven. Also they had bacon rashers, which were like ham, and steamed vegeatables. The meat and taters tom coated with Whitesauce, which was onion salt and flour and delicois. Dessert was rhubarb crisp. They really went all out for us. Nick started to talk to them. Mattie and Chelsea and I were quiet, except for when the people would ask us questions. Nick was very eager to talk about...himself. It was just like being in FYS again. He would get Tom or Patricia’s attention, and then talk about something related to him or his achievements or something. Eventually it got old, and the irish people would try to let us talk. But nick would hijack the conversation. It got to a point where Nick was telling a story about how he is only half Swedish and never really looked at that side of the family, yet he got the Sweidsh man of the year award in Minneapolis. Patricia was going to say something and Nick said he wasn’t done with the story, and Patricia basically rolls her eyes and says “oh, i guess I’ll hold off on the praise till your done”. So then after a while Nick lets us talk, but always looks at me. At 1030, Tom finally drives us home. We drove by the Gaol, and the Barracks. We quickly said bye to Nick, and he basically said “bye.”
