Mattie and I got on the bus at 9:30, even though we knew there would be a 2 hour layover in Tralee. The tickets were about 28 Euro. I think that the bus ticket system is like a reverse exponential curve- the ticket prices steeply rise the farther you get from town, but level off eventually. We drove through Macroom with the Penis bar and that Topaz gas station for the umpteenth time, because that is the route to Kerry. After about an hour and a half we got to Killarney. We then waited for a few minutes and kept going to Tralee. I was listening to the Breandan powers cd and martin hayes the whole time, because the winds of tulla and the rights of man are epic songs. It was a beautiful sunny day. Driving through the Kerry countryside, with the tall brown mountains looming over the fields dotted with white sheep, while listening to Trad, is like the best thing ever. We eventually got to Tralee and stepped outside. As I would eventually say, Tralee is like small town America’s decay. It was a boring place. We were hungry so we got this light and unfilling sandwhich for 4 euro at turners pub. Epic Beard Man, a hippie looking guy with a braided, footlong white beard, eventually went there too. He was the other person on our bus heading to Dingle. After the café, we wandered around in Tralee trying to stave off boredom. It didn’t work. There was nothing really to see or do there, so we walked up random roads. We went to Dunnes and I got what were basically ginger nuts with custard in the middle. They were awesome. Finally, it was almost 2:00.We got the bus with the epic beard man.
The drive on the dingle peninsula was awesome. There were clothes hanging out to dry on peoples lines, and cows in yards. Little kids would entertain themselves, even though they were miles away from a town. Do they realize that they are in such a beautiful spot on the planet? The ocean and mountains were so close, and clouds cast shadows on the brown heather and gorse. I wish we could have stopped for pictures. Another cool thing is that the bus stopped in many places along the way that were just small settlements, or else people’s houses. You can have bus eireann pick you up and drop you off, even if you live in the middle of nowhere!
We got to Dingle, and the first thing we did was go to the tourist office and try to get a map. A nice lady gave us directions to our hostel, and a map of slea head with all the cool stuff marked. It was pretty cool! So then we set out for our hostel. We passed by this Indian resrtaurant, and it looked so good we decided to go there for dinner later. We walked west by this roundabout, and then onwards. Eventually we were out in the countryside. Cars and coaches and buses would whizz past and almost slaughter us. We got to the hostel and nobody was there except these 2 germans who came in after us. They had huge backpacks. I remembered a person on the hiking club say that germans love to hike and backpack. We walked around the very very empty and quiet hostel, until we saw this this little sign that said call for reception. Mattie called, and we waited for the staff to come. It was this guy with long hair, dirty hands, and dirty socks. He walked in socks to the hostel from his house. He was austrialian, and we never actually got his name. But he gave us a choice of rooms, and we chose the upstairs ones over a dorm that was next to the kitchen, which he said was going to be having a big party that night. Our rooms were really nice and had sauna like doors and skylights.
Then I asked him about climbing that big hill behind our hostel. He said it takes like 45 min. So we set out, and walked to the west. We walked on this peaceful country road for a long time, in the hopes of finding a way up, but all we found was driveways. We eventually found a road that snaked up the side of the hill. We got to a fork and went west. We saw these sheep in the road, and they lead us to this little corridor between stone doors. Yay! Finally a way up the hill without walking through some guys property! But the entire hillside was coated with gorse. We couldn’t make it. So I suggested we try the eastern fork. Sure enough, there was a sheep path through burned gorse! We walked up and saw a dead bird, and then got to the this heart shaped stone ring. Then, we made it to the very top, and saw this other stone ring! We took a bunch of pictures. I was trying to take a perspective shot, and this one rock was covered in bird shit. So I wanted to turn it over, but when I took it out the whole wall fell!!! I had to jump back or my camera would have gotten hit. Mattie was pissed, and so we rebuilt it right away. Good thing nobody else was around or I would probably have gotten beat. We repaired the fairy fort and just chilled on top of the hill. We kept seeing plumes of smoke and smelling the smoke, because of the farmers burning their gorse bushes. But we took many pictures of the sunset and walked back into town to meet matt and andy when they got off the bus.
So we met matt and andy and then went to dinner. We went to this Indian place and got kebabs and chips. I got the curry cheese chips and doner burger, and it was soooo much food for 8 euro. It was really good though. We then walked towards the hostel, and Mattie called the guy to see if we could check in for real. He said he would pick us up along the way because the roads were dangerous at night with the speeding cars. So the Aussie picked us up in this creeper van that smelled like the Mixa’s old vans. It was funny. We put our stuff in the rooms, and then Andy spearheaded the effort to go into town. We walked the back way out the gate, and got caught up looking at stars. Zimmer talked alot, like usual. Oh, Matt.
We tried to squeeze in a few pubs, and then ended in the Dingle Pub. I had a Smittick’s and it was the best thing ever. They played a song about Black and Tans and I happened to be wearing those colors. But i didnt get beat. Then we walked around dingle. There are so many innuendos in this town! Dykegate street, Strawberry beds, Tom Long’s, and Dick Macks, a pub that’s slogan is “As you like it”. Ha! They have to have known. Then we went to the hostel, and Aussie said he would drive us into town at 10 tomorrow! Woo hoo! He said the weather should be nice too, which turned out to be totally false.
March 5th
So we woke up after a decent sleep, and got ready to bike around Slea Head. We waited around while the Germans made roasted bacon, eggs, and tomatoes. It smelled so darn good. There were other Americans and people in the hostel but we didn’t talk to them. Last night Aussie said that the weather would be good. It was extremely foggy. Kerry hates us, I still think. Every time we have a huge weekend trip out there, the weather does not cooperate.
We got dropped off at Foxy John’s the half hardware store and half pub. It was awesome. He led us to this sketchy back room where they kept the bikes, and we got them and one came with a map. Mine didn’t have a bell though. We set out on the hill in Dingle, and eventually made it to the roundabout. There was really only one road, and there were signs everywhere for it. It was Slea Head drive, and we set out. When we set out and got on the open road, you could actually smell Ireland. The sheep and cow shit smell permeated the foggy air, and contained a hint of salt from the huge ocean. The good thing about biking the route, though, was that we could get off and climb around or take pictures anywhere we want. I was already disappointed in the weather when we got to the first stop, which was to see this cliff. Matt bet me I couldn’t take just one picture. I failed by taking 3. Then we kept going. We randomly saw this sheep just rubbing its ass on a metal gate. It was hilarious. I think it was actually pleasuring itself, because there were no balls on this sheep. Also, it was really cute to see the new baby lambs that must have just been born a week or two ago.
We got confused on the distance, because I thought we were in ventry and we may have been in dingle harbor. We finally got to the first attraction, the dun beg stone fort, which apparently means little fort. There was a fat man in a booth, and he charged us 2.50 to see the fort. We went down there and played around on it. I said something about him catching us and getting mad, and andy stated he would have to waddle all the way down here to do so. We found this little hole in the wall and called it the hotbox room, and took pictures. Then we walked back up and kept biking. I was not tired yet at this point except for a little from yesterday’s walking. We eventually got to the Beehive huts, which were these cool huts. Apparently they were old as hell, and waterproof somehow. There was construction ish work going on because one of them caved in. Probably a damn tourist.
Matties facebook status as I type this on Sunday night:
Quote of the weekend: "Those are some nice asses!" (there were donkeys everywhere). Also:
"At this point I think it's a little late to–HOLY CRAP IT'S A FRICKING CASTLE!!!" -Eric Uzelac
"I kicked a gorse (bush) and I liked it." -Eric
"Look! The Z-claw works on cats too." -Eric
"I've given a cow a c-section and put down an animal with a ...tire iron, but Eric you disgust me!" -Matthew Zimmer
"At this point I think it's a little late to–HOLY CRAP IT'S A FRICKING CASTLE!!!" -Eric Uzelac
"I kicked a gorse (bush) and I liked it." -Eric
"Look! The Z-claw works on cats too." -Eric
"I've given a cow a c-section and put down an animal with a ...tire iron, but Eric you disgust me!" -Matthew Zimmer
Then we tried to get some mileage in before we ate lunch at danquin. We went and saw this one lookout place, and matt wanted to climb down it, so we did, and then I took some pictures with the tin whistle. We were starting to get a little tired. We then came to this cool spot in the road, and took pictures. It was a fricking narrow irish road, right next to the ocean. Matt climed down the cliff to take a piss, but ended up dallying around. We then made it to this town and beach thing, and ate our sandwhiches on the beach. We had bought a tub of ice cream and sandwich ingredients at the store last night after tandoori, and sat down at this beach and ate it. We were getting not very talkative at this point, because we had concerns over time. Matt and Mattie wrote dingle is awesome in gaelic and then we kept going.
Now we were in the second phase of the day. The biking was getting harder, and the scenery not as great. We passed Danquin, and I realized that my measurements were off and we probably didn’t have time to go by Brandon. We passed the three sisters, which were probably beautiful but we couldn’t see. Dammit. We passed people’s houses. It just struck me how people could have normal yards, normal houses, and normal families this far out from everything. In the USA, remoteness leads to decay and drugs. We kept going, and then got to this crossroads. We saw this one stupid American come up to us and ask directions. He told us how to get to the gallus observatory, so there we went. He was not actually stupid, I just was tired.
On the way to the obserevatory, I was biking near the wall of the road. I think my tire scraped up against the curb, and I tripped and fell right into a gorse bush! I got cuts on my back and legs and stab wounds in my arms. It was very random! The other people helped me up, and I was pulling thorns out of my clothes all day. We instantly talked about how that was the fairies revenge for me damaging their fort yesterday. Fairies are real, and mean.
We walked up to the observatory and there was nobody there, so we checked it out. It was cool. Then we kept going. We eventually got to this hill, and this town called Ballydavid. We took the hill route up to this old church. By this point in time, all of us were exhausted, and we didn’t talk much. Then we biked up this hill. My legs gave out and I got way behind the other people. I had to walk it. I was really hating this being tired and didn’t care about anything besides being done. Then, we made it to the top and it was smooth riding all the way down to Dingle.
We returned the bikes to Foxy John’s and had a celebratory pint of Smitticks. Then, we went to this really overpriced seafood place and spent 10.95 on a cod burger. I will never do that again. Then we to the store, and I bought cereal and milk for 1.75. Andy bought Workin Dog wine, and this ultra spicy shitty wine. Then we went to the hostel and showered and played like 30 games of P’s and A’s. I was the president for like the last 4 rounds, and it was awesome. Other than that I sucked. Then we went into town at andy’s bidding. None of us but andy wanted to party and so I feel bad we rained on his parade. Then we went back and went to bed. I asked Aussie for seans number incase the weather got nice and I would call him for an hours trip out to slea head to take pictures. Mattie is bossy when she is tired, and she ordered me out of the room when she changed. All in all a fun day, but we were tired and the weather sucked.
March 6th
We woke up at 8:30, and the Germans were making quite a feast for breakfast again. I ate like 4 bowls of that cereal. Damn it was good. Then, we went and climbed the hill. Nobody said much. The weather was shitty, so I didn’t give Sean a call. Then we went into town and got dropped off by Aussie, and took some pictures of boats before we sewed this trip shut.
After the bus rides back, I did laundry, and then practiced, and then Mattie said that Carlins recital was today and we need to watch on my computer because her internet is slow. Yet another instance of Mattie being needy, like at college. So we hooked it up in her room and it didn’t work so she and peter came to my room and prevented me from typing this up. Carlins recital came in shitty, but it was cool to watch and make comments on. We got to see arnott and the gang, and watch it snow in MN. I miss the snow. I made fish fillets and cleaned up the room, because it’s a cleaning check on tueesday and billy had a damn party and deflowered my Jameson glass.What the hell, Billy. That was my damn Jameson glass that I wanted to drink out of for the first time.
